that’s one of the things about defining “sexual attraction” as “looking at someone and thinking that you want to fuck them”
i think lesbians in particular often have a difficult time even recognizing that what they’re experiencing is attraction?
i rarely look at a woman and think to myself “dang i want to fuck her.” it’s always more just a strong feeling, like a sense of being really drawn to her or being interested by her or enjoying her a lot, that just feels different than finding someone intriguing or cool in a platonic way.
i’ve known i liked women since i was thirteen years old and i still have a hard time recognizing when i feel attracted to a woman! on more than one occasion i have misinterpreted those feelings as intense dislike or outright HATRED. sometimes i’ll walk by a woman and think to myself “i wonder why i found her so interesting to look at,” before remembering that i’m a big fucking lesbian
it’s just a very internal and subjective personal experience that won’t be the same for everyone and attempting to concretely define it or dissect it into discrete parts is always going to be a fool’s errand